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Aouie's Journal

Thursday, January 25, 2007

What True Love Is...

My boyfriend and I lived together for years and he is an Engineer by profession. I love him for his steady nature and I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders.

Three months of courtship and now, two years engaged, I would have to admit that I am getting tired of it. My reasons for loving him has now become the cause of my restlessness. I am sentimental and extremely sensitive when it comes to relationships and to my feelings. I yearn for romantic moments like a little girl yearns for candy. My boyfriend is my complete opposite - his lack of sensitivity and his inability to bring romantic moments into our relationship has disheartened me about love. One day, I finally decided to tell him that I wanted to break up with him. "Why?" he asked, shocked. "I am tired, there are no reasons for everything in the world!" I answered.

He kept silent the whole night, deep in thought with a lighted cigarette.

My feeling of disappointment only increased; here was a man who can't even express his predicament, what else can I hope from him? Finally he asked me, "What can I do to change your mind?" Somebody said it's hard to change someone's personality and I guess I started losing faith in him.

Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered, "Here is a question. If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind. Let's say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death, will you do it for me?"

He said, "I will give you your answer tomorrow..."

My hopes just sank by listening to his response.

I woke up the next morning to find him gone and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting underneath a milk glass on the dining table near the front door that goes...

My dear,

I would not pick that flower for you, but please allow me to explain the reasons further.


This first line was already breaking my heart but I continued reading.

When you use the computer you always mess up the software programs and you cry in front of the monitor, I have to save my fingers so I can help restore the programs.

You always leave the house keys behind thus I have to save my legs to rush home and open the door for you.

You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city; I have to save my eyes to show you the way.

You always have the cramps whenever your "good friend" approaches every month - I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy.

You like to stay indoors and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.

You always stare at the computer and that will not do any good for your eyes. I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old I can help to clip your nails and help remove those annoying white hairs. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand...and tell you the color of flowers, just like the color of the glow on your young face...

Thus my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do... I could not pick that flower yet and die.


My tears fell on the letter and blurred the ink of his handwriting. And as I continued reading...

Now that you have finished reading my answer and if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk...

I rushed to pull open the door and saw his anxious face tightly clutching with his hands the milk bottle and loaf of bread...

Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does and I have decided to leave the flower alone...

That's life and that's love. When one is surrounded by love the feeling of excitement fades away and one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace and dullness.

Love shows up in all forms, even very small and cheeky forms, it has never been a model; it could be the dullest and boring form. Flowers and romantic moments are only used and appear on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of true love stands...and that's our life...Love not words win arguments...

XOXOXOXOXOXO
by anonymous

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a.o.u.i.e. scribbled this @ 5:06 AM
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Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Love Your Job but Never Fall in Love with Your Company

I got this from a friend of a friend's multiply blog. It's a good read as well as a good reminder to us lowly workaholic corporate slaves. It's an excerpt from Mr. Narayana Murthy’s speech during a Mentor Session.

Mr. Narayana Murthy is the CEO of a premier IT company in India. He is one of the top 50 influential people in Asia according to the Asiaweek publication. Mr. Murthy is also the new IT advisor to the Thai Prime Minister.


Love Your Job but Never Fall in Love with Your Company because You'll Never Know when Your Company will Stop Loving You

I know people who work 12 hours a day, six days a week, or more. Some people do so because of a work emergency where the long hours are only temporary. Other people I know have put in these hours for years. I don’t know if they are working all these hours, but I do know that they are in the office this long.

Others put in long office hours because they are addicted to the workplace. Whatever the reason for putting in overtime, working long hours over the long term is harmful to the person and to the organization. There are things a manager can do to change this for everyone’s benefit.

Being in the office for long hours, over long periods of time, makes way for potential errors. My colleagues who are in the office long hours frequently make mistakes caused by fatigue. Correcting these mistakes requires their time as well as the time and energy of others. I have seen people work Tuesday through Friday to correct mistakes made after 5pm on Monday.

Another problem is that people who are in the office long hours are not pleasant company. They often complain about other people (who aren’t working as hard); they are irritable, or cranky or even angry. Other people avoid them. Such behavior poses problems, where work goes much better when people work together instead of avoiding one another. As managers, there are things we can do to help people leave the office.

First and foremost is to set the example and go home ourselves. I work with a manager who chides people for working long hours. His words quickly lose their meaning when he sends these chiding group emails with a time-stamp of 2am. Sunday.

Second is to encourage people to put some balance in their lives. For instance, here is a guideline I find helpful:

1. Wake up, eat a good breakfast and go to work.
2. Work hard and smart for eight or nine hours.
3. Go home.
4. Read books/comics, watch a funny movie, dig in the dirt, play with your kids, etc.
5. Eat well and sleep well.

This is called recreating. Doing steps 1, 3, 4, and 5 enable 2. Working regular hours and recreating daily are simple concepts. They are hard for some of us because that requires ‘personal change.’ They are possible since we all have the power to choose to do them. In considering the issue of overtime, I am reminded of my oldest son. When he was a toddler, if people were visiting the apartment, he would not fall asleep no matter how long the visit, and no matter what time of the day it was. He would fight off sleep until the visitors left. It was as if he was afraid that he would miss something. Once our visitor’s left, he would go to sleep. By this time, however, he was overtired and would scream half the night with nightmares. He, my wife, and I, all paid the price for his fear of missing out. Perhaps some people put in such long hours because they don’t want to miss anything when they leave the office. The trouble with this is that events will never stop happening. That is life. Things happen 24 hours a day. Allowing for little rest is not ultimately practical. Things will happen while you’re asleep, but you will have the energy to catch up when you wake up.

Hence, love your job but never fall in love with your company.

XOXOXOXOXOXO
by Narayana Murthy

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a.o.u.i.e. scribbled this @ 2:42 PM
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Thursday, January 18, 2007

Someday

Someday, you'll gonna realize
One day, you'll see this through my eyes
But then I won't even be there
I'll be happy somewhere
Even if I can't.

I know you don't really see my worth
You think you're the last guy on earth
Well, I've got news for you
I know I'm not that strong
But it won't take long, won't take long.

Chorus:
'Cause someday, someone's gonna love me
The way I wanted you to need me
Someday, someone's gonna take your place
One day, I'll forget about you
You'll see, I won't even miss you
Someday, someday.

But now, I know you can tell
I'm down and I'm not doin' well
But one day, these tears
They will all run dry
I won't have to cry sweet goodbye.

Repeat Chorus twice

XOXOXOXOXOXO
by Nina
please don't chase me anymore...not unless you're ready to catch me...(callie, grey's anatomy)

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a.o.u.i.e. scribbled this @ 8:02 AM
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Saturday, January 06, 2007

My Little Baby

Once upon a time I had a little baby. I met him in April 2002, the summer before my fourth year in college, just a few months after he turned one. He's a smart little boy who loves to dance, clap, and talk, and he's a big eater who once cried and screamed his head off when he saw me walk away to take a call from my dad. He's a smart, sweet, and happy baby. He's my baby...my little Joseph.

Joseph was adopted and brought to Australia right before I graduated from college. I've never seen him or heard anything about him since then, not that I ever went back to the orphanage where I used to play with him for two hours a week, every week for almost a year. I know it's not anyone's fault, I even knew from the beginning that his adoption was bound to happen, but I got attached and having him leave hurts. I couldn't bring myself to go back because I figured if I don't see for myself that he's not there anymore, I can always pretend that he's still there but I'm just too busy to visit.

It's his sixth birthday today and I know he doesn't remember me or a single thing we did. But it's okay. I can remember for the two of us...

I remember playing blocks with him...I remember watching cartoons with him sitting on my lap...I remember helping him eat Jolly Spaghetti and Yumburger...I remember the swimming trip in Antipolo, the mini-concert on the Bel Field, and the Ecopark field trip in my old high school...most of all, I remember him falling asleep in my arms with me thinking that there really is nothing in the world more peaceful than having a child fall asleep in your arms.

Happy birthday my dearest baby. I know you don't remember me and probably will never have any memory of us spending time together, but know that there will always be someone here, back home, loving you, thinking of how you are, and praying for your well-being. Be good to your parents, okay? And be the best person you can be.
How I wish I could see you today so I can give you a big birthday hug.

I love you Joseph and I really, really miss you.

XOXOXOXOXOXO

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a.o.u.i.e. scribbled this @ 6:42 AM
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Tuesday, January 02, 2007

A Collection of Random Quotes

As we grow older, it becomes difficult to just believe. It's not that we don't want to, but too much has happened and we can't.
- Samantha, Now and Then

I went looking for my ideals outside of myself. I discovered it's not what the world holds for you, it's what you bring to it. The dreams dearest to my heart are right here.
- Anne Shirley, Anne of Green Gables: The Sequel

If you love someone you say it, you say it right then, out loud. Otherwise the moment just passes you by...
- Michael O'Neill, My Best Friend's Wedding

I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.
- Harry Burns, When Harry Met Sally

Love means never having to say you're sorry.
- Oliver Barrett IV, Love Story

Even if we never talk again after tonight, please know that I'm forever changed because of who you are and what you've meant to me.
- Holden McNeil, Chasing Amy

I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.
- Seth, City of Angels

William: I live in Notting Hill. You live in Beverly Hills. Everyone in the world knows who you are, my mother has trouble remembering my name.
Anna Scott: I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
- Notting Hill

Michael: Why me?
Mia: Because you saw me when I was invisible.
- Princess Diaries

I love you without knowing how, why, or even from where. I love you straightforwardly without complexities or pride. I love you because I know no other way than this. So close that your hand, on my chest, is my hand. So close, that when you close your eyes, I fall asleep.
- Patch Adams, Patch Adams

You are everything I never knew I always wanted.
- Alex Whitman, Fools Rush In

Kyle Davidson: You want me to tell you how I feel about you?
Miranda Presley: Yeah.
Kyle Davidson: Okay, okay. Uh, sometimes you hear a song on the radio and it's just the song you want to hear right then, and then it's over and you're just glad you heard it.
Miranda Presley: And I'm like that song?
Kyle Davidson: No, you're nothing like that song. You're like if that was the only song in the world that I could hear for the rest of my life. You're that song.
- The Thing Called Love

Henry: Do you really think there is only one perfect mate?
Leonardo da Vinci: As a matter of fact, I do.
Henry: Well then how can you be certain to find them? And if you do find them, are they really the one for you or do you only think they are? And what happens if the person you're supposed to be with never appears, or, or she does, but you're too distracted to notice?
Leonardo da Vinci: You learn to pay attention.
Henry: Then let's say God puts two people on Earth and they are lucky enough to find one another. But one of them gets hit by lightning. Well then what? Is that it? Or, perchance, you meet someone new and marry all over again. Is that the lady you're supposed to be with or was it the first? And if so, when the two of them were walking side by side were they both the one for you and you just happened to meet the first one first or, was the second one supposed to be first? And is everything just chance or are some things meant to be?
- Ever After

Albert: You know, honestly, I never knew I could feel like this. You know? I swear I'm, I'm going out of my mind. It's like I want to throw myself off of every building in New York. I, I see a cab and I just wanna dive in front of it because then I'll stop thinking about her.
Hitch: Look, you will. Just give it time.
Albert: That's just it. I don't want to. I mean, if this is the only way I can stay connected with her, then... well, this is who I have to be.
- Hitch

We need a witness to our lives. There are a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'.
- Beverly Clark, Shall We Dance (2004)

I'm going to feel this way until I don't feel this way anymore.
- Sandy, Tootsie

I think sometimes... you have to lose somebody completely before you can figure out what they really mean to you.
- Dawson, Dawson's Creek (TV)

Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too - even when you're in the dark. Even when you're falling.
- Morrie Schwartz, Tuesdays with Morrie (TV)

I don't give a crap about what other people think of me. Because I'm a happily independent and successful woman and I like it that way, only when you say stuff like this, it just makes things too hard. So please, don't chase me anymore, unless you're ready to catch me.
- Callie, Grey's Anatomy (TV)

My father told me there are two types of girls: the ones you grow out of and the ones you grow into. I hope I'm the latter. I may not be the one you love today, and that hurts. But I'll let you go for now, hoping one day you'll fly back to me. Because I think you're worth the wait.
- Chloe, Smallville (TV)

Luc: Why are you chasing after him, after what he's done to you?
Kate: Because I love him!... And because I'm afraid that if he doesn't come back, it'll hurt so much that part of me will just shrivel up and die and I'll never be able to love anyone ever again.
- French Kiss

Love isn't about ridiculous little words. Love isn’t about grand gestures. Love isn’t about airplanes pulling banners over stadiums, proposals on jumbo-trons, giant words in sky writing. Love is about going that extra mile even if it hurts, letting it all hang out there. Love is about finding courage inside of you that you didn't even know was there.
- Gabe, Little Manhattan

I wonder if you think about me half as much as I think about you.
- Adam, Untamed Heart

Nothing could possibly match that moment. It's everything you wait a lifetime for and that dream finally came true. What else could ever come close?
- Peter Colt, Wimbledon

But in the end, the most important thing to accept is that no matter how alone you feel, how painful it may be, with the help of those around you, you'll get through this too.
- JD, Scrubs (TV)

XOXOXOXOXOXO
25 quotes taken from the 39-page movie and tv show quotes i've compiled.

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a.o.u.i.e. scribbled this @ 3:01 PM
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