Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Untitled
never say i love you
if you don't really care.
never talk about feelings
if they aren't really there...
never hold my hand
if you mean to break my heart.
never say you're going to
if you don't really plan to start....
never look into my eyes
if all you do is lie.
never say hello
if what you really mean is goodbye...
XOXOXOXOXOXO
by anonymous
for him who held my hand but broke my heart...Labels: poems
a.o.u.i.e. scribbled this @
2:59 AM
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Happy Birthday!
It's your birthday today and for the first time since 2002, I didn't attempt to call you at midnight and greet you. I contented myself with sending you a forwarded happy birthday text message. I don't know if you received my message though...because you never texted back. Not that you're obligated to respond or anything, it's just that during your past birthdays you would always reply thank you to my messages. I couldn't help but wonder what happened for you to react differently this year.When I decided not to call you like I used to do, I told myself I'm doing it because I would really want to start moving on. That's the mantra I kept repeating to myself the entire day. But I still can't stop myself from checking my phone every hour or so to see if you texted. Pathetic. I know.
For awhile now, I've been toying with the idea of telling you, once and for all, three years worth of everything - how I feel, what I think happened, and where I am now. I want to demand honest answers to my questions and finally put an end to this silent and painful vigil. But I'm scared. I'm scared that telling you everything will drive you away for good. I'm scared of losing what little I have now. I'm scared of losing you, even though I never really had you in the first place. Most of all, I'm scared of myself...of what I'm capable of doing. I'm scared that I would find myself breaking down in front of you and begging you for a chance. I'm scared of seeing my mask slip away, of watching my pride crumble before my eyes...XOXOXOXOXOXOfor him whom i hold close to my heart...happy birthdayLabels: scribblings from me, snapshots
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
A Fairy Tale Season...
In the end, it only makes sense. In the end, there was no more fitting end to a fairy tale season. The Ateneo Blue Eagles closed out the La Salle Green Archers 77-70 to capture their first championship in fourteen years...The Blue Eagles' season - coming back from being down 4-5 on the brink of elimination, stopping a sweep by a seemingly invincible foe, and squeaking through the semis past a team that had beaten them during the first two rounds - would reverberate throughout Philippine basketball history as one of the most spectacular tales ever. Ending, as most fairy tales do, happily ever after...
- an excerpt from 'Tale of the Blue Eagles'
it's been three years since ateneo won that dream championship...three years since that fairy tale season...
three years since that night i thought i could never be happier...when i was rushing to araneta to make the 4 pm game...when we were cheering our hearts out at the last UAAP basketball game of our senior year...when we braved the throngs of people outside araneta and made our way back to school giddy with the thrill of winning the championship...when you reached for my hand as we were walking around campus screaming cheers for the fun of it...when we had our arms around each other as we watched the fireworks fill the night sky with vibrant colors...
it's been three years...three long years since that night i fell in love with you and didn't know it...
it's 2005. ateneo has yet to win another championship and i have yet to move on...
XOXOXOXOXOXO
in honor of the cheers, the championship, and the fireworks...Labels: scribblings from me
